A better person

What is it that brings people to sail the waters of our world more than freedom, independence and peace of mind like I was taking about yesterday? Vistas like this of course. It must do something good for your brain and your heart to wake up to a view like this instead of rain and clutter which is the case in many parts of the world. I can even go that far to claim that a view like this is what have made me a better person, just because I need less of everything else so to say. I can jump off our boat any second and enjoy the luke warm water, maybe have a turtle swimming by and all along the way get warmed by the healing sunshine. In moments like that there isn't much else you would want to wish for yourself. You feel kind of content with what there is, right there right now. 

P.S: Don't forget to check in a bit later, will share with you our favorite sites of the month.

P.S 2: And do not miss to check out what the worlds greatest/largest/most famous sailing website, Sailing Anarchy, has to say about our little video today, find it here. Thank you for featuring us yet again.

It's all about freedom

When people ask us what is the main purpose, the real drive behind sailing the world and living a life like this, the answer that always comes to mind is, because we want to feel free. However egoistic or selfish that might sound, it's all very simple, we just want that: to feel free, have a peace of mind. We have no huge saving-the-world-mission going on here nor are we out on this journey just because "it's a fun thing to have done", but what is driving us are all those unnecessary things one might have to face in a normal life. We don't want no stress, we want no bigger problems than the ones we manage to create for ourselves, we don't want anyone interfering with our time on earth, no one telling us what to do and what not to. We want to be able to do the things we love, design the life the way we feel like. We want to share beautiful moments only with people we love being around and the ones that we feel happy and comfortable with. We want to see the world with our own eyes, maybe finding a place to settle for a few years or continue to search for that perfect place for years to come if that suits us better for that time being. This journey we're out on is the best way we've found to achieve all of that. This is the only way we have figured out that gives us real peace of mind and we are willing to work hard each of these days in various  locations around the world to maintain this liberating lifestyle that we have chosen as our best bet. Don't get me wrong now, we have a lot of things to do here, a lot of work and projects to take care of which sometimes means 14 hours of non-stop work and a lot of sweat and pain, but we're doing it all because we have chosen it as parts of our life, and obviously because money doesn't grow on palm trees.. 

Life is so incredibly beautiful if we manage it well so we simply just don't want to waste our time if you know what I mean. To be egoistic and to take control of your own life is for us the best way to live as that gives not only happiness to oneself, but also to the people that you choose to be around. I am more humble and thoughtful to my family and people that I care about today than what I have ever been before, while at the same time being more distant to what consume too much of my energy in a negative way, and it all comes down to the same philosophy: Life was made to be lived in peaceful and harmonic manners. When the mind and soul is in peace because you do only the things you enjoy doing, the things that moves you forward and when you surround yourself only with the energy you feel balanced with - that is for me to have found freedom. And that is in the end of the day, the reason why we have chosen to live the way we do. Some weeks we're broke and dirty as a result of expensive and time consuming boat renovations and not much work for us as freelancers', other weeks we're tidied up with pockets full of cash but all the time we're on our way towards our own dreams. Living the life we have chosen for ourselves. Since we began this journey and discovered the truth of it, both the good the bad and the ugly sides, neither of us can imagine living life differently. Everyday thankful that we made this dream reality. 

Home is where your heart is

Was about time that I got to show Alex my home country which we both enjoyed very much, but we always seem to miss our little boat whenever we're away for too long. Although she's currently a big mess with things and tools all over the place, nothing beats the feeling of being home. I am still, two years after I moved aboard a boat with Alex, amazed at how easy it was to adapt to a life in confined spaces on water. Tight, hot, not always so comfortable, currently no functioning water heater, not always enough electricity to charge the laptop, not quite enough space for all the belongings we wish to have with us - yet still this is where we feel most satisfied. Strange? Maybe, but there simply is something utterly fulfilling with being unattached in the way that you are when you have only yourself to rely on. Only the thought of that we can turn the engine key or hoist the sails any second and change location to almost wherever in the world, gives such incredible sense of independence, which I believe most of us are yearning for in one way or the other. Sometimes we look back and reflect upon the fact that we left a slightly more normal way of living to live aboard a small sailboat far from most of our families and friends, and even though life occasionally can be hard in the way we have chosen to live it, we still think this was the right way to go. There are many more dreams waiting for us to fulfill and every step, every deck fitting we re-bed, every new winch that is getting installed, every hour of work in front of the computer, every argument we've gone through and every hour of organizing inside of the boat is just taking us one step closer to those dreams. It is amazing how almost everything that we do in our everyday lives nowadays are intentionally or unconsciously connected to those dreams and it is pleasing to know that we have the power to make reality of them all. With a focused mind and a mutual understanding for the goal and the process, I sincerely believe we all can make our own miracles come true. 

Memories of past and future

Got served fresh mango juice this morning on a table cloth that reminds me of warm childhood summers picking blueberries with my grandmother. 20 years ago but still so close to my heart. Speaking of age. Very soon I'm turning thirty... there's a great intimate party in the planning. For the change of age I don't care too much, but I'm looking very much forward to spend the day with some really amazing people. Isn't that what is the most important in life anyway? Not things nor possessions, but relationships with people you meet during your lifetime. Sometimes it feels like I have had it all, done and possessed what many only can dream of, but in the end of the day what is etched into my heart and what gives me smiles, warmth and good memories for a lifetime, are the friendships, relationships and times I had the blessing to share with people that I loved. Some does naturally fall off along the way as life is such, not everything is meant to be forever, but the memories and lessons that I have kept from them all are what makes me an incredibly thankful and rich human being.

Fighting misery with love

The roller-coaster in which we've mentally traveled these past weeks should come to some sort of finalization, or at least a pause, tomorrow - as we'll cast off for a ten days work-free vacation. Yes, we are sailing around the world, but no, we are not some filthy rich kids who can go on and on around this globe of ours without making money during the way so that's basically what we've been busy doing for the past weeks or months, can't remember as I'm trying to repress the misery. Besides of work there has been a mountain of issues and obstacles scattered on our way so this holiday that we are to look forward to which begins already tomorrow, will mark the start of a new chapter in our lives. Work and problems are still not completely dealt with and done but at least we will be able to take a break from it all, leave the problems and stress in Antigua and enjoy life in a way it was partly made to be enjoyed. With friends, music, food and love. I know some of you are dead curious about the issues and problems we've faced which I've mentioned briefly in some metaphorical ways and one day I might tell you. One day when the issues are far gone and distanced from now. Never been good with talking about current problems, somehow they are always easier to discuss in retrospective. Good news is that we are two brains and two hearts here fighting against it all, together. To share your life with a person who has the same values and beliefs as oneself is the best thing I've ever done. No one is perfect, no relationship, no person but if there's love, trust and the fundamental values are well combined then you're literally able to move mountains together. Love has a strength I never experienced nor thought existed before I met Alex.

Here's something I've been listening to today while finalizing some photo editing. Sound that makes me fly far away and forget stress and worries at least for a moment. (Alex has by the way made the masters for those two tracks and the complete EP "We make hits, not the public" by Downliners sekt. Read more about that specific vinyl on their Soundcloud.)

Sunday reminder

Read on here to get a fresh reminder of why it is so important to be true to yourself. Why it is so valuable to choose happiness, take advantage of your strength to fulfill those dreams that you always had and why you should dare to say all those things that you always wanted to say. One day it is all too late and I certainly will not let myself become one of them who are full of regrets when I die. Life is precious and it is yours to embrace exactly the way you've always wanted to.

Happy Sunday everyone.

Living with the ocean

Late, by myself, in the boat of myself,
no light and no land anywhere,
cloudcover thick. I try to stay
just above the surface,
yet I'm already under
and living with the ocean.

From The Essential Rumi, poems by Rumi, translated by Coleman Barks.

Floating in between

Slowly but surely I'm realizing what fundamental changes this journey has made to my mind and my persona. Physically and geographically we haven't come that far as yet and we've been locked up with schedules, deadlines and/or work ever since we left Barcelona for a bit more than one year ago. I haven't had the time nor peace to reflect from the inside in the way that I wanted, yet I have came to many smaller conclusions and discovered many truths that are profoundly important for the future. I have made a few smaller steps towards the inner me, which was the main purpose of this journey after all. You know the person that you are deep inside of yourself when you are completely naked with no external/social influences and you are as stripped from other peoples opinion on everything that surrounds us, as possible. I don't think we can ever completely be our true selves as we're already affected by so many deeply ingrained patterns of thinking, events that has shaped us and by the outer worlds propaganda and thoughts regarding everything there is to have a thought about, but I do think it is important, at least for myself: to try to reach towards that bare, inner self as far as humanly possible.

Feeling like I'm one step on my way towards a more spiritual and fulfilling future, slowly searching my way forward, but the other foot gets constantly distracted and is somehow still stuck in the past, fighting to get things done, to work, to maintain what is needed to be held up. Things are definitely happening within, but it's frustrating that I can't take those reflections to the next level before we're out of here, before we have finished what we've started, when work has slowed down a bit. Longing so much for the time when we're far away from possibilities and opportunities to do other than just be, when there is only Alex and me and at least for a while: no work, no plans, no schedule. I even long for the time when I can take a pause from blogging for an extended period of time to see how it really feels to be completely disconnected. But for the time being there are so many things happening, so much work and great projects that are in the starting process and which are good to consider for the future that I/we just need to keep it all running.

We're still struggling to find that comfortable, ideal balance in life, it certainly doesn't come over night even though you left everything behind to start something of a new life. My mind is currently moving two steps forward, one and a half step back, just like I said the other day, so I better keep my energy for what is our main priority of the moment: work. I wonder if I will miss these active days of jobs and projects when we are stuck on one tiny, deserted island in the Pacific Ocean. Most probably. Because as much as I believe that it is possible to find some sort of fulfilling balance, I know for sure that we human beings are constructed in a way that we will never be completely and utterly satisfied, at least not for a longer period of time. My daily meditation is for me a new psychological tool which is well needed in these times when floating in between the worldly/physical/practical world and the one that is mental/spiritual. 

Baby dogs and children

Look at this beautiful pitbull/rottweiler baby girl, it almost breaks my heart to lift her from my lap and leave her back to the owner. If only we could have one of these onboard our boat, a pity they don't stay this petite for the rest of their lives. But kids and dogs will have to wait a few more years till the day we are ready to turn our focus from adventure and our own personal development, not sure when/if we will ever be ready. Have been talking a lot about kids lately with several different people as it seems like it's kind of expected of a woman close to thirty to start planning for family and kids. It is not at all a must in my world. I don't necessarily need own children to complete myself and I/we are still not certain if it is the right way to go for myself/us. To have children at all that is. I'm scared to love them too much, to get totally overprotective and loose myself completely in the process. One day I love the idea, I can picture our own little family and I know what an amazing father Alex would be, the next day I'm sure that I will never have any children at all because of the fact that it would bring just too many more headaches into life and I really want to keep things simple, and some days we're more into adoption and could imagine ourselves taking care of a few of the ones less fortunate. There's so many kids out there in the world without parents, security and love so why putting more children onto this planet. But as I told you, I'm still not sure what is the best way to go and luckily I got a few more years to think this all through.

Combined headaches

If you all were my close friends I would here share with you why the past fourteen days have been shit for 6, 7, 8 or maybe even 9 different independent reasons. But now we don't have that intimate relation and this is a somewhat commercial blog where only around 5% of my/our lives are shown. Also there's something like 100.000 people checking in here every month so I better keep it all to myself. Good news is that apparently what doesn't kill us makes us stronger, wiser or more humble and this journey was made for just those inner reflections that has been a great part of my life during the past two weeks. 

There's always two sides of a coin

The differences and changes of one nights sky to another never cease to impress me. This moment was almost surreal in its marvelous beauty and quietness. You know that moment when you begin to question those incredibly naive and childish things like how we human beings are able to fight, stress our way through life or occupy us with anything destructive when there is such magnificent beauty around us that could heal our poor souls if we just opened up our eyes and got closer to the real things in life. No matter how cliché, I truly believe that a closeness to nature makes us more humble and somehow manages to soften us as human beings if we only are open to that kind of change.

And, of course, the proximity to the quiet nature could also drive you completely crazy when you're fed up with soul searching, finding your inner peace and all that crap. Living on a boat and sailing around the world gives you a lot of time to go through both those contradictory emotions and many nuances in between. One day you marvel at all that beauty and tranquility that gives you so much fulfillment and you ask yourself why you haven't always lived this close to the nature, next day you wanna pull your hair out because everything is so.very.fucking.peaceful and you swear to god that on next island you'll jump off at you'll locate the busiest bar in the neighborhood and get yourself as drunk as humanly possible to forget how much you miss your friends and something crazy happening around you. But that's just to get used to. We can't always have everything we want at the same time, can we. Until I find the magic formula I'll continue to enjoy the sunsets best I can - sometimes while drunk and pathetic, but most of the times happy with the greatest sense of thankfulness for all what we get to experience on this journey of a lifetime. The journey across the South Pacific will for sure be a great mental challenge for us both.

Take your time, enjoy it while it lasts

Thankful

Very soon time for us to leave our cramped boat life for a few days again.. to what magical place and destination I'll tell you very soon. We are blessed to have such tremendous diversity in our lives. Sometimes I want to reach out and thank someone for all that what we have and all what we receive, then I quickly remember it is only ourselves (and of course our parents for putting us onto this earth) that I can give that credit. We are exactly where we want to be and we are there only because we made it possible for ourselves. No one choose our destiny and path of life but ourselves. That knowledge alone gives me the encouragement to dream and work my way towards those dreams, every single day of my life.

Times are different now

When reading this blog one might get the impression that sailing around the world is only about cruising between paradise islands, snorkeling in crystal clear waters, sipping on tropical drinks while chilling on deserted beaches, hiking in colorful rainforest and so on but surprisingly (not?), it is also a lot about physical work, maintaining your ship and keeping everything clean, tidy and in order and also to fix everything that might get damaged as you move along on the seas. Like this little chore that I have been delegated to perform once a week or so. Scrubbing the bottom of the dinghy from barnacles, algae and other sea creatures. Not a very fun job if you ask me, but that's something that must be done, as much as we need to clean the bottom of the (sail)boat every once in a while, clean and polish the deck fittings to prevent them from corrosion, change sails every time we are underway depending on the change of wind force, bring fresh water to the boat with jerry cans from shore when the water maker cannot be used due to inappropriate water in the anchorage, haul the dinghy up or down between the water and the deck of the boat when arriving to or leaving an anchorage - and then all kind of other small things that have taken myself quite some time to get used to, such as washing clothes for hand when there's no laundry place nearby, clean the dishes with salt water and only rinse with fresh to save on the water in the tanks, move things around on the boat every time we have visitors as there's not much more space than for two with all of our belongings and so on..

A life on land is very very convenient when you compare it with a life on a boat that's for sure, but it is also obvious that there are tons of benefits with a lifestyle like this that outweighs the physical work needed. It just takes some time to get used to it all, and thinking back now on the previous life which was lead before we move aboard this boat - I have hard to even remember how it felt to not have to work this hard with my body to get things done. And then I'm thinking about all that money I used to waste on taxis because I was too lazy to walk, all the dry-cleaning needed for the delicate fabrics of the clothes that I wore, all the membership cards to different sport clubs and personal trainers that I rarely made use of because of laziness and the massive amount of water I used to clean single pieces of clothes in the washing machine as it was "urgent" (and not to mentioned all the money spent on clothes, travels, dining out etc..) life is definitely much more simple now. More physical work, not at all as comfortable as on land, but also it is much more straightforward, pure and simplified in a way that is so liberating for the mind. 

Gone are the clutter, waste and laziness, instead we use only what we really need and if we wish to move from A to B we need to make sure to do so with our own physical efforts (with the help from the wind of course) and would there ever be any problem with the boat or any of our equipment, we need to make sure to fix it ourselves and with our own bare hands (mostly Alex', obviously). And I like it like this, simple, natural and straightforward. I think you would be surprised to see how fast it goes to wean oneself from the things that you thought were absolute necessities in life. 

If I could encourage everyone of you to get out sailing some more in your lives, I would do so - there is so much you'd learn about yourself, our world and about what one really needs that is quite interesting to experience. Also you will never ever be in better physical shape than what you are after a few months on the seas from all that hard work, that's for sure.

For the ones of you who hasn't been sailing much in your lives, what are your perception of a life sailing around the world like we do? Could you ever imagine yourself doing it for some years of your life, and if so, what do you think would be the positive/negative sides with a lifestyle like that? Am curious to hear your thoughts.

P.S: By the way do you see the thin black string hanging from my sunglasses? Alex got me those as I still, for some stupid reason, haven't learnt that the sea is a greedy bastard who swallows everything she can get a hold on. After loosing five pairs of Prada, Rayban and Marc Jacobs shades to the ocean in the past twelve months, it was about time to hook the new ones firmly in place. Just one of all those things one needs to get used to on the seas...

Let it storm

Not as strong as expected but still enough to remind us of how incredibly small we human beings are on this place called earth. It is a reminder of that the nature doesn't care all that much wether we live or die. We are just a part of the life we created for ourselves and we'll stay around only for as long as we manage to survive. Human life and the raw nature feels brilliantly synchronized and in harmony with one another at times, incomprehensibly incompatible at others. 

Running away

Quite often since we began this journey of ours, we have received the same question: What are you running away from? Just like a journey around the world, and a detachment from what you might think is "normal" is something that must be "wrong". We have sometimes met this perception that exists out there that people who are not interested in locking themselves up with a conventional job or who're not interested in settling down in one specific place, must be "running away from something bad". And every-time I receive the question I laugh and I wonder: Where the fuck do you want me to begin?

If you have read this blog before, you should have also understood what we actually are running away from, it is partly explained here, here and here. But if you have a second to spare I can try to refresh your memory, but listen closely as a few of you seem to have missed the point in what earlier has been said.

We run away from conformity, from routines of an everyday life that doesn't suit us and times and appointments that we have no interest in living by at the moment, we run away from cold air, snow and miserable weather. We also are not very fond of the psychological climate that sometimes occurs in both big cities and small villages where people tend to become jealous, bitter and fake when they are not fully content with their own lives. We want to escape mundanity and stagnation. We also wish to eliminate the closeness to people who are everywhere around us, the ones who are insecure and who take their bitterness out on others. We want to get released from the stress and pressure that sometimes is a part of the normal everyday world. In the normal world, the society and the people like to box each other in to categories, and as long as you know who you are, this shouldn't be too much of a problem, but here on the seas you almost don't have to face that conflict at all. We do not wish to stay in one place for the moment as the world is huge and offers so many possibilities. We want to see it all, experience it all, smell thousands of flowers and taste a vast amount of fruits before we know where we wish to settle.

Both of us have gone through quite a few relationships in the past, long and short, good and not so good ones, not so serious and the very serious ones, but this is the first one where we both feel that we finally have found completely right. This journey is a fantastic way for us to get even closer to each other, to get to know every part of each other without too much of outside distractions which hopefully will help us prepare for the day when we wish to begin expanding this little family of ours.

We have always been explorers, vagabonds, travelers, free-spirited gypsies in heart and we are immensely interested in different cultures, in inspiring people, in the simple but beautiful things, the real, naked world and its natural wonders - and in order to stimulate those interests, we must "run away" as you call it, to be able to experience for real. For us it has never been enough with only "visiting" places for a week or two, we've always wanted to become a part of the cities, towns and countries we stayed in as we know that this will help opening up our eyes to the magics of the world, even more. We have embarked on this journey to get a chance to breath, to be able to feel something new. We do this to get a chance to feel free, you know, we want to study what type of feelings and thoughts one can experience, create and embrace when not following the rules and codes of a mundane traditional way of living. Do you know how much there is to feel, understand, experience and see when you are no longer part of the normality, but instead free on your own? There are many people in the "normal world" who can inspire you to make business in the best ways possible and who can teach you a thing or two about ... things. But there are not many people out there in the locked up world that has something new and inspiring to say about true things. Because it sometimes seems like everyone are copies of each other. And as soon as one inspiring person arrives, people tend to imitate that very one and suddenly you don't know who is who, as they all blend into the same soggy mixture where everyone desperately tries to be the one.

Me and Alex are dreamers, doers and even creators and we love life too much to lock ourselves up when we know that there is a possibility to sail the oceans of the world. We have no will to live by someone's else law or order for the moment as we know that there are other ways to go in this life and we know that there still exists the possibility to feel much more free than what you do in your "normal" world. Therefore we have taken the chance and the possibility to release ourselves for a while. We have given ourselves the opportunity in getting out of the normality and into the wild. Into a world where only we (and the weather) decides what we will do, where we will go, what time we should wake up in the mornings. For the moment we are not interested in anything else than making ourselves, our families and closest friends happy and content human beings and the rest of the rules, worries and questions a normal world might offer we do not pay too much attention to.

I know that some of you might think that this all sounds selfish, but this is our truth. We do what we want, we go wherever we wish, we go to sleep and wake up whenever we feel like, we have the whole wide world as our playground, we have not much to complain about as we don't put ourselves in trouble and pain and we are making sure that we can fulfill all of our dreams, the small ones and the big ones, one after another, day after day.

Why? Because we can.

Good morning

What better way to start off the day than with plenty of tropical vitamins?

Sugar apple (pretty similar to the South American cherimoya which I love), starfruit and mango. Because yes, there are plenty of other delicious fruits in the Caribbean than only my beloved mangoes.

One commenter reminded me of the quote from one inspiring man who once upon a time in the 50's left his successful career as an actor in Hollywood, he walked out of a shattered marriage, he defied the courts and set sail on a journey to the South Seas with his children. A remarkable story was later on written in his famous autobiography Wanderer, which continues to inspire people all over the world. 

Delivery

Just got a package from Brazil.... what can it be?

Will show you soon, I'm sure you will like it.

It is very interesting to read your thoughts by the way, like in the previous post below for example. Most of you can relate to what I have to say, some of you don't and that is fair and highly normal as we all are shaped differently - but also quite a few of you have the tendency to read wrong into written words. You should never believe that I judge peoples lifestyle or have any objections to the choices they make, as long as they are happy with what they've chosen. What I've always questioned though, are those people out there who wish to be happy and want more of their life, but who don't take the advantage of their inner strength and go out there to grab what life has on offer because of fear of failing, fear of embarrassing themselves, fear of being left alone and lonely or because they need to prove something to everyone else around or whatever else reasons there can be that prevents you from doing what you truthfully dream of. You know the ones who stay in destructive or unfulfilling relationships or with boring jobs or in places or towns where they do not feel like they belong even though they know they would have been much happier and more fulfilled with something/someone else. You know the ones who dream and dream but never come to fulfill any of those inner desires because of fear. Those people are the ones I speak to when I say what I said in the post below. You others shouldn't allow yourself to take my words too personally, if you do I must assume you are one of them I just mentioned.

Try to make yourself happy, be conscious of what you really need, what you really want, who you are deep inside, don't lie to yourself and try to enjoy your life to the max, you got only one. Life shouldn't be much harder than that, some of us realize this when they are young, for others it takes a whole lifetime to figure this out. Everyone chooses individually when the time is right. And obviously, it goes without saying that you are free to choose to do exactly the opposite of what I just suggested if you think that works the best for you.

Now if you excuse me I will try on what was hiding inside of this colorful package. Talk to you later.

Fear and falling

What many people do wrong in this life is that they don't dare to make mistakes. It can drive me insane when I see so many human beings with great potential being locked up because they are afraid to fail, afraid to fall, and desperately they hold on to the only reality they ever knew, thinking that this must be the only way to go, even when they're not content with their life situation. But it is not before you let go of your lifelines, when you've released yourself to the risks of the reality, when you fully opened up your eyes and acknowledged the truths around you and when you have fallen on your own knees a couple of times that you fully can become you. Do you really want to remain a pale shadow of what you could become? Do you really want to limit your own personal development just because you are afraid? Afraid of what? What is it that could really hurt you? Take some risks, enjoy your life, break some rules, don't look back and remember that there are thousands of other ways to go than the safe road you always walked along. Life is grand and holds a mountain of opportunities, both technically and mentally. Don't limit yourself to the minimum.

dreaming

lots on our minds here in between hard work at the moment. so much to plan for, so much to see, so much to do and to fulfill, so many things we wish to indulge in and to explore.... the world is full of so many opportunities. we just have to be awake and go through our lives with eyes wide open to be able to catch them when they arrive.